safe motherhood


Father's perspective

Now that your baby is a few months old, you will know just how much relationships change when you have a baby.


First and foremost, your relationship with your partner changes as you begin to see each other as father and mother of your child. However, you are still lovers and it's important not to give up the things you enjoyed doing when there were just the two of you. Sex won't be as spontaneous or frequent as it used to be perhaps, but it could be more special.


You may find that your relationship with your mother changes completely when you become a mother too. As the sheer hard work of looking after a baby hits home, a typical comment from new mums is: "I'm now beginning to appreciate how much my mother did for me!"

If you and your mother didn't get on very well, a new baby can represent a new beginning. There's a chance to think again about what went wrong, to re-open the mother-daughter dialogue, resolve the past and move on.

Sisters and brothers

People often say that it is their siblings who are the most help when a baby arrives. Sisters often love becoming aunts, and brothers love becoming uncles, even if they're quite young themselves. If they haven't had children themselves they may enjoy learning invaluable skills for when they become parents and, if they have children of their own, they may be able to offer help and understanding.


Friends with children may become more important to you, but try and keep in touch with the childless ones. The problem here is that childless friends won't have a clue what becoming a mother is like. Chloƫ says: "Tom's birth nearly destroyed my oldest, closest friendship, especially when my friend told my husband she couldn't see why I wasn't coping better!

I got over it though and we're still friends. I can't wait to see how she manages when her time comes!"

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